Oh My, Ego!
We have seen it repeatedly in the news, in magazines, or heard it on the radio how the rich person takes their life, the musician that overdoses, and the beautiful supermodel that suddenly disappears. There are many who create fame and fortune for themselves, only to lose it all. Many become depressed because they have not found love, happiness, fulfillment, or most importantly purpose from within. Why do the ones who appear to have it all are often the loneliest, saddest, and most miserable?
Who Are We Really?
Our ego can be a controlling and influential idea that each of us has about ourselves. We often allow it to be part of our identity preventing us from becoming our true authentic self. It is the false idea of believing that we are what we do and what we have. Ego is nothing but an illusion that is responsible for creating separation and distinguishing a person from the whole. Sigmund Freud, the renowned neurologist, founded the discipline of psychoanalysis in the early 1890’s and theorized the human psyche to understand the workings of the human self-image, the “I”. Taking a more Eastern approach, Freud’s protégé Carl Jung, continued to build on his concept of the ego.
Does the Ego Provide Us the Protection We Need?
Having an ego is not all bad. Some ego traits are essential for life. For example, fear can be a biologically crucial survival mechanism to save us from danger. Others would argue having an ego can help push us towards success in life. However, is this really the case? Nowadays, we are aware of dangers that threaten our physical well-being. In addition, this same drive creates greed, jealously, and resentment causing us to ignore other aspects of life. The ego’s main function is physical survival. In our early years, we listened to it because it protected us and taught us boundaries.
Conditioned by society, our experiences, culture, and as mentioned earlier fear, our ego’s main job is protection from ourselves. It enjoys talking about its wants, needs, desires, anxieties, and stresses. Playing out the worst-case scenarios in our heads to bring upon us panic, judgment, and shame in order to make us feel right and victimized. The ego’s voice can be firm and authoritative. It can play on our emotions and convincingly make us feel powerless and insecure. When it comes to striving for dreams and success, the ego seeks validation and strives for superiority. It has a need for an identity to fulfill its empty void.
Should We Destroy the Ego Altogether?
This is not possible to destroy our egos. Oftentimes when we are developing spiritually, we believe it is necessary to destroy to do so. Our lives are intertwined by our egos through our language, our linear time, and our relationships. It is part of us. We need it to interface with the societal rules and to manage our 3-dimensional lives. Once we can accept that our ego will always be present, we can then develop one with integrity and truth.
During our spiritual development, we experience an internal conflict between fear of the ego and the love of spirit. Making us feel as if we are teeter tottering between the two. Our bodies have a built-in intelligence system that knows authenticity and harmony from ego-driven activities. Our intuition communicates with us letting us know when we are in alignment with our higher self or not. As our true self emerges and our spiritual awareness expands, the ego resists fighting to survive. When life becomes difficult the ego wants to return to what is familiar reverting to our old beliefs and actions where it feels comfortable and secure. However, our true self instinctively moves us towards a new way of living and away from an illusory way of being.
Time to Let Go and Lean In
Thousands of thoughts run through our minds every day. Some are conscious and others subconscious. Awareness of such mind chatter is challenging; however, it is crucial when traveling a spiritual path to pay attention to when our body is telling us when we are out of alignment. We must realize when the ego is creating uncertainty, confusion, and struggle it is trying to convince us that our old beliefs are better than the new ones. Telling us the illusion of deception is more enticing and alluring than the truth of who we are. As long as we continue to cling to our old ways of being, the ego will remain in control, and we will continue to live in conflict. Our body is all knowing and wise. When we let go, lean in, and hand it over we begin to find out who we truly are. The true essence of our being.